Adjusting

The last few weeks have been big in the Penney Household.  The biggest change has been Grace starting Prep and me starting back at Uni, in a much more intense and time consuming course than last year.  We've also had Mum staying with us, which has been great, but she's gone back to Tas now - and everything changes again.

Grace has handled everything brilliantly, settling into Prep with way more enthusiasm and contentment than I could imagine or hope.  She's had 2 full-time weeks so far, and not once complained or even jokingly said she doesn't want to go.  I'm so relieved and amazed that she has done so well, it sure makes the transition 100 times easier.

~~Morning circle time at Prep~~

I've settled back into Uni ok.  I've been up at Logan Uni for the last 2 weeks, with only 1 more week of intensive lectures to go.  Then it's all online from home and also attending 6 women through their pregnancy, birth and postnatal period over the next 6 months.  I've already got 1 confirmed follow through, who is due in 3 weeks - meaning I've already attended an antenatal appointment and have to make sure I can get another 2 in before the birth!  It's very exciting though, knowing that in roughly 3 weeks I'll hopefully be getting a late night call to head into hospital and might even have the privilege of catching my very first baby!  They apparently like to throw us in the deep end - sorts out the dedicated ones from those just doing it cause they "love babies"  Attending appointments also means I have the pleasure of experiencing the wonderful wait times of the hospital, nothing like running consistently 2 hours late for a 10 minute appointment to get you frustrated! 

It did work quite well this week though, as Mum dropped me off and then headed to the Rockpools with Xav.  It was so quiet down there, so Xav got most of the place to himself.  Apparently he wasn't interested in playing with anyone else though, too enthralled in floating leaves and flowers down the sloping side.  Mum did have a little embarrassing moment with him though,  He got a splinter in his finger, but wouldn't let her near it to get it out.  He was getting tired and asking for light touches (lucky she was pre-warned about his fetish!), so she cradled him in her arms as he started to fall asleep.  A few moments passed, then he sat bolt upright and yelled "I don't want to drink milk from your booby"  Mum was mortified, as there were people around and probably wondering who the freaky Grandmother was trying to breastfeed her 3 y/o grandson - I'm fine with wet nursing, but that might be taking it all a little too far!  Hence the reason why in this photo, he was sleeping a little lower than breast height!

~~Xav having a snooze at the Rockpools with Nan~~

But, the person having the hardest time adjusting to our new routines is Xavier.  He is really missing Grace and is craving time with her.  Of a morning he's glued to her side wanting to play, and the same again come pick-up time.  They've slept together for the last 3 weeks whilst Mum was here, and supposed to have gone back into their own beds yesterday.  However, tonight I over heard Xav creep into Grace and ask if he could sleep with her, as "Mummy has Daddy to cuddle of a night, and I really like cuddling you Grace"  Being the wonderful and kind big sister that she is, she made room and welcomed him in. 

I'm really feeling sorry for Xav though, even though I know he'll adjust and be fine.  After last year being so excited about going to pre-school and barely acknowledging me as I left, to now feeling like the new kid and reluctantly letting me leave.  He has a few kids he knows, but most of his friends have started Prep this year.  He gets on so well with the older kids, and although being only 3, has always been so accepted by Grace's friends.  He keeps complaining that the 3 y/os at Pre-school are "babies" and even now spends his time trying to mix with the older kids.  I'm always told by his teachers that he is so easy to have around and always has a fun day, but he just doesn't seem to be his confidant self.  He's not unhappy, probably just re-working his place in the pack.  I think Grace & all the girls where his security blankets and now he's learning to cope without that.

Dancing is something else that's making me sad for my little boy.  All the girls (Grace, Leah and Cass) have been moved up to the next room - leaving Xav behind once again.  Last week was their first time back, and he was adamant that he's not going dancing by himself.  He really wants to participate though, and said he would if Malia or Logan came too - so now just to convince them!  He loved dancing last year and is desperate to do another concert, so I'm hoping that even if they don't come, he'll get the courage to go on his own.

I'm banking on not next week but the week after, things will start to work themselves out.  I've got uni all next week in Logan, meaning I'm away from 7.30am - 6pm every day except Wednesday.  The week after I'm home though, so Xav and I'll have lots of time together, working out a routine for us.  Last week, I was mourning Grace not being here and reluctant to plan anything as I didn't want her to miss out.  But, I've come to the realisation that this is just how life is right now, and Xav and I can have a different kind of fun together without Grace.  It's not that I don't want to do all the fun things with Xav, It's just been so long that I've had a twosome to take everywhere and it feels kinda weird and wrong with 1 missing.