Free!! (nearly!)

Uni is nearly finished for the year and it couldn't be more welcomed - not just from me, but my whole family!  All my exams and assignments are done and dusted, now it's just the nervous wait for results.  I'm 99.9% confident that I passed, it's just whether my gpa is going to remain a healthy high 6 or take a dive - which will most likely be from damn research! I should find out results in a few weeks, and whatever I get I'll be proud!  This semester has been very busy and I am just grateful to be coming out the other end.

I've still got 5 shifts to finish at the hospital, and I'm hoping to get them finished this week - yes, I'll be busy and tired.  I just want to get them over and done with though, as I've got big plans for the summer break!  I've still got one lovely little baby to welcome into the world - little stinker is 8 days over today!  It will be a beautiful birth centre birth, which is always very special to me as that's where I birthed and met my little boy.  I've got my fingers crossed that tonight's the night, as I think poor mum is over being pregnant and just wanting to meet her little baby.  I'm very excited about this birth as it's one of my friends, so this baby will be in my life for many years to come!   I do get very attached the babies that I welcome, especially the ones where I've cared for the mum all through her pregnancy.  It feels like a break-up at the 6 week appointment, when have to say our goodbyes and that's why this one will be extra special. I'll get to watch the baby grow up from a slippery, slick newborn into a little person.   

I've got so many things I want to get done over the break.  I want to de-clutter and clean every room in the house, which is going to be a big, but very satisfying job (just have to sneak things out when Xav the hoarder is not around).  I have new curtains to sew and hang in the lounge room and lots of little craft projects to start and finish.  Grace's birthday is in 2 weeks, so I have her party to organise as well as her school celebration.  We have multiple Christmas carols to attend, as well as the schools summer festival and Grace's graduation ceremony from prep to year 1.  Then there are lots of bbq's, beach and picnic outings to have!  I'm so excited to actually have lots of time to do these things, all without thinking that I should be studying!  I'm free!!!  I can't wait for Grace to finish up at school and we can go back to the good old days of me being at home with the 2 kids, and doing as we please every day!  I'm very nostalgic for those days, although I do love what I'm doing now too. 

Anyway, I'm off to get a few hours sleep as I'm hoping (every things crossed!) that I get a call in the middle of the night to say a little baby is ready to join us xx

Jabbing the child

Xav had his 4 y/o needles on Wednesday and after my last attempt at doing this by myself, I organised it for when Duane would be home.  I'd explained to Xav what was going to be happening, and pulled out the parenting big guns - BRIBE!  I'm not fond of using bribes for everyday things, but this is a one off and I was hoping that it would make the whole experience a little less stress full for everyone involved.  I asked him what he would like and he suggested a Mintie as he'd caught be the week before with a mouthful of one.  I'd bought a family pack (although I didn't share with the family!) to munch on as I was churning out a very boring research assignment and he decided that one of those would be a perfect swap for a jab.  I also said he could play on my i-phone (another very special thing that he rarely gets to do)  and have the headphones in.  Now this proposition, of chewing on a mintie AND using the i-phone was enough to actually get him excited and begging every day in the lead up, to actually go to the Dr earlier.

So, with all this excitement and constant nagging to go get his needles, I was feeling very confidant when Duane said he'd have to work late and wouldn't be able to come along.  No problems!  This will be a breeze - I have a willing participant!

Well, he was all big and brave until he realised once we were at the Dr's what was actually going to happen.  He must of glossed over the whole "getting and needle" thing and just focused on minty goodness and technology.  Once he realised though, there was no way he was going anywhere near the nurses station.  I had to carry him screaming his head off and writhing in my arms.  Once in there, I managed to shove a mintie in his mouth calm him down, so I could sign all the forms.  After the mix up last year, I also insisted that I would be checking each vial for the correct medication. Xav, was ok by now.

Until I had to take his top off to get started.  Then he cranked up the screaming again, but this time he was yelling "Check my heart, just check my heart then let me go home"  I'm guessing he thought if we used the stethoscope, we'd forget about the 2 needles that were drawn up and ready to be inserted  There was nothing I could do but bear hug him, whilst he was jabbed simultaneously in each arm.  Over and done with nice and quick, and then the screaming stopped.  Could have had something to do with the stickers and freddo frog the nurse had just handed over.  He smiled, filled up his mouth and skipped his way out.  Over and done with.

Thank goodness that doesn't need to happen again for a while!

Rhyme Time

Every morning in the car on the way to school drop off, the kids and I play a different game.  Some days it's me asking them the names of particular baby animals, eye spy or thinking of a different animal starting with A and then working all the way through to Z.  Yesterday, Grace decided that we'd pick a word and then go through all the other words that rhyme with it.  It's usually nice and simple and I'm often amazed at how clever they are at coming up with an abundance of different words.  As she chose the game today, she got to chose the first word.  She chose "Witch"

You can see where this is going hey?  I knew as soon as she uttered that word that it could get messy.

She came up with "stitch" as the first rhyming word.  Perfect.  But then I could hear Xav over the back going through the letters and adding a different one to the start, trying to work out a word.  Excited, he then yelled out,

"I know Mummy, Bitch rhymes with Witch, doesn't it?"

I was hoping I hadn't heard right as I was fairly sure he'd never hear this word before, so I asked him what that word meant.

"You know, when you are a drummer you have a good Bitch" 

Oh, crap - now I was starting to get nervous about where he had heard the word and what context it had been in.  So I re clarified, asking again what that word meant.

"Mummy, like a drummer.  You know, they have good Bitch - like in music"

Then I clicked.  He was trying to say PITCH!  So after much reinforcement of correct pronunciation, he got it and was still quite happy that pitch rhymed with witch.  Later I realised that I probably should have explained that Bitch really meant female dog, but at the time I was a little taken aback! 

Xavier

I really need to brush the cobwebs out of here, but every time I come in I get overwhelmed!  I've had so much that I want/need to blog about, but trying to work out where to start after such a long break has been weighing me down.  So, I thought I'd just plonk something down to break the ice.

My little boy just cracks me up at the moment!  I meant to blog ages ago about his funny little habit of slipping the word "actually" into every sentence, sometimes twice.  He managed it seamlessly for about a month, but stopped suddenly a few weeks ago.  After quizzing him on it, he said that he'd overheard me telling someone, and was a bit upset so stopped.  Oops!  I "actually" thought it was very cute, and it just proves again to me how strong willed my little boy is - he stopped immediately!

Some other funny little Xavier moments.  He told me the other morning that he wanted to start a rock band and travel the world.  When I asked him where in the world he's be travelling he said "Africa, Trude's place, Logan's place, Nanny's place - all over the world!"  He's allocated himself to the drums and lead singer, whilst Daddy will be on the maracas, Grace on the tambourine and I'm on the keyboard.  We are going to travel around with Xav the self labelled "rockstar".  Sounds like fun hey!

There are many more funny Xav moments, but it's hard to remember them all.  I spend most of the day laughing with him or engaged in deep, thought provoking conversation.  He is the coolest kid to talk too and sometimes the way he analyses and thinks about things just blows my mind!  He's been so patient and understanding over the last few weeks as I've been spending lots of time on assignments and study.  He plays happily with his cars/lego/planes/bike only bothering me only for something to eat.  Sometimes, I can tell he's so desperate for someone to play with though - so I have a break and immerse myself into his little world.  To see his whole face light up and his play get even more animated  when I'm pretending to be the voice for a car or whatever job I've been given, is just beautiful.  He still misses Grace crazily when she is at school, and although he is quite happy to play by himself, when she is here they are in their own little universe together.  They play so wonderfully together, and the thought and imagination that oozes out when they do is beautiful. 

Xav is such a loving and cuddly little boy.  Every day he tells me he loves me (although today he told me that Rockstars don't kiss their mummies!).  Every night, without fail, he still sneak into our bed and hops in beside me for a cuddle - which I love. 

September

September has been and gone.  Spring was here too, although for a brief moment and has now morphed back in to winter.  I've been busy studying, midwifing, parenting, procrastinating and trying to keep all balls in the air.  There was a mid-semester breakdown last week.  I'd had enough of spending the days trying to write essays, construct reports and just generally keep up with the uni work load.  I wanted to be out enjoying the beautiful spring weather with my family, not stuck in the abyss of databases.  My mini breakdown coincided with the "normal" mid semester break on the timetable.  Unfortunately my course doesn't allow for such a frivoulous waste of time, so we just keep ploughing on.  I am taking this week off doing shifts though so I can at least spend some time doing fun stuff with the kids whilst Grace is on holidays.  I still have course work, appointments and a few quick hospital appointments I have to make.  I've also got someone coming up to their birthing day, so that can always change even the best laid plans.  I've completed all my skills and practical exams now, so just needing to finish all my hospital hours, 2 assignments, 1 exam and then I am officially halfway to being a midwife.  Oh, that is a little exciting and very scary.  I've also been fortunate to be invited into the honours program, which apparently is a big deal and something I should be putting some serious thought in to.  Later, when I have time I'll think about it.

Apart from the pulling and tugging in all different directions, I'm loving this semester.  Having so much practical at the hospital is fantastic, and although there are some people to be wary of, most of the midwives are wonderful and so keen to share knowledge with the next wave of midwives.  It's such a hands on course, and I'm still blown away about some of the exeriences that I've already had.

The kids are wonderful.  Grace is enjoying her holidays, spending lots of time with Grandma and Daddy.  Next week though I have some fun adventures planned with her and I.  She had her spring festival on the last day of term and was so excited to be hanging out with the big primary kids. The theme was "Dreamtime" and all the children where asked to wear yellow, red or black.  The older kids danced around the maypole, which was mesmerising and exciting for everyone.   All the classes had been busy coming up with business adventures to develop and sell at the spring markets.  The preppies got off easy and just had to harrass their parents for home made goodies, which were sold at the market for 50 cents per serve.  Some of the wonderful ideas from the older classes were badges, ice blocks, potted vegies and seedlings, second hand clothes, mystery show bags and face painting.  The children were all asked to bring along $5.00 to spend, which managed to go along way as everything was so cheap.  Grandma also came along, but spent most of her money on the children that were busking

She also lost her second tooth.  It had become wobbly on Jaspers birthday and she lost it on Logan's birthday!  It was put out for the tooth fairy, who left another little charm for her bracelet.

Her first lost tooth

 
After 5 weeks of having a wobbly front tooth, Grace's very first tooth has fallen out.  I think she's had the longest wobbly tooth in history, she was so gentle and careful with it - both excited and nervous about it coming out.  She put herself on a self imposed diet of soft food in the last few weeks, scared that she'd bite into something hard and without realising, swallow her own tooth!  She was also worried about the blood loss (she's getting better, but still not great with blood) and having to deal with that at school.  Lucky it all worked out exactly as she'd hoped, and she lost her very first tooth in the privacy of her own home with a parent around to help.

When it did finally come loose (it had been barely hanging on over the last week!), it was just after school and Duane was home with the kids.  Grace started crying, and Duane wasn't sure what was wrong as she sat crying with her mouth firmly closed.  Finally she said it was her tooth, so Duane asked her to open up so he could have a look and sure enough there was just a big gaping hole!  The tooth was floating around loose in her mouth, so he got her to spit it into a tissue and they cleaned it up.  Once I was home, we put it in the little decorated match box that we had waiting and left it on the kitchen bench for the tooth fairy.

The next morning, immediately after opening her eyes, Grace said she just knew that the tooth fairy had been last night as she'd felt her tickle her on the cheek.  Xav, who was hoping for a visit from the fairy himself, was quite dissapointed that he hadn't felt her come, to which Grace explained that she wouldn't be visiting him until he also started loosing teeth!  She jumped out of (our) bed and ran out to see if her tooth was still on the table.  The match box was still there, but also was a little wooden tooth box covered in fairy dust.  She carefully opened up the drawer of the box and inside was a delicate silver charm bracelet with a single fairy charm.  She was over the moon and thrilled that the tooth fairy had left her something so special.  Xav was unfussed with the offering, and just said "Where is the money?"  The tooth fairy had also been kind enough to allow us to keep her tooth as it's her very first lost one and something sentinmental Mummies like to keep - very understanding tooth fairy!

Catching Babies

I'm 5 weeks into this semester and I'm still not sure how I'm going to fit everything in!  I thought last semester was busy, but this one is even worse and I'm having a great time but longing for some down time.  I've started shifts at the hospital, which has been amazing, but taking up so much time, that I've haven't even started any study yet.  I was rostered in birth suites for the first 2 weeks and was so lucky to have a beautiful birth on each shift.  On my first shift I cared for a woman from the beginning of her labour until about 4 hours postnatal - it was a wonderful spontaneous birth and I was lucky enough to catch the baby at birth.  I was buddied that time with a midwife that seemed to have a skewed idea of being "with woman" and spent most of the shift downstairs sucking on nicotine.  It was stressful for me at times, being in charge of monitoring (via doppler) interpreting and caring for the woman - mostly by myself, on my very first shift.  I felt like I was constantly looking for the midwife, so that she could teach and support me - but mostly having to just do it all myself. There was a shift change just before the woman birthed, so a new midwife was their for pushing.  I can't begin to describe the feeling of catching my very first baby!  Knowing that I was the first hands on a brand new baby, is such an honour and privilege and a moment that I hope to always respect.  Seeing that brand new family bond and meet their baby for the first time is just so beautiful and it almost feels like an intrusion to be there. 

The next shift I was also lucky enough to support a woman from the beginning of her labour to the end.  This time though, I had a wonderful midwife who was so kind and supportive and gave me lots of confidence.  I once again cared for the woman through the labour, but this time I knew that the midwife was close by and would be there instantly if I needed her.  A funny thing happened this time though.  We'd just examined the woman and she was 4 cm dilated.  About half hour later the midwife went out to the Midwives station to right the results on the board.  It was a quiet night and I was the only person in with a labouring woman, all the other Midwives and Dr's were sitting around talking and drinking coffee trying to stay awake during the night shift.  About half hour after the midwife left (so 1 hour after the examination) I started noticing signs of what I thought could have been second stage, which is time for pushing.  I thought during each contraction I could see parts of the head, but wasn't totally sure  as it was a first time mum and we'd only just assessed her an hour before as 4cm dilated.  A few other things had me questioning if it really was second stage though, so I walked out to the Midwives station (remember, it's my second shift and I've fronting up to all the midwives, Dr's etc here!) and said "I know we only just assessed her and I've probably being very presumptuous and over cautious, BUT I think I can see signs of second stage"  They all kinda looked at the board then looked back at me as if to say "Crazy student has no idea what she is talking about!"  The midwife I was with said, "Ok, I'll come have a look and then go for my break - baby may just be in a posterior position and giving early signs of pushing, but it's most likely not time yet"  She came in, checked her quickly then announced "You were right!  Head is on view"  Half an hour later I caught my second baby!

On another shift, I also made the rookie move of not getting gloves on quick enough.  It is drummed into our brain to "Never trust a Multip", So never trust a woman that has laboured before - I've definitely learnt that now!  I was with a fantastic midwife caring for a woman having her 3rd baby.  She'd just done an examination and she was 7cm.  I turned around to wash my hands and get some new gloves on, turned back and there was a head out laying on the bed - I missed that catch!!  All the midwives had a laugh about that and recalled there own stories of taking their eyes off the woman for a second and turning back to see a baby already there!  I'll hopefully never do that again.  Everything was fine though, and even though baby came out very quickly she had no tears - thank goodness!

I also had one of my follow throughs have a magical birth on Monday.  It was by far my favourite as I'd been able to do all her antenatal care and we had such a great relationship and understanding of each other by the time she was in labour.  I felt so comfortable in her birth, and having that connection antenatally made caring for her in labour so much more intuitive.  I was able to once again do all her care and support in the birth and catch her beautiful little baby.  The high after that birth was amazing and I can't believe that I get to feel so good doing my job.  Seeing her grow through the pregnancy and then watch that transition from woman to mother is such a special relationship to witness.  It is an absolute privilege to be there at that moment and I try very hard to be respectful of the new family whilst still going about doing all the things I need to do. 

I've got a couple of week in the Antenatal clinic now, so lots of talking, blood pressure, palpation's and education - which is certainly different for the highly emotional and sometimes full-on environment of birth suites.  I'm hoping that these few weeks won't be as busy though so I can finally start on my actual course work as I haven't even opened anything yet and I have a research literature review due in a few weeks followed by 2 more essays not long after.  I'm not stressed about the work though, I know I'll get it done.  It may not be at the standard I normally like to submit, but I realise now that my time on the shifts is where most of my learning will be happening and although my marks won't reflect how well I'm going clinically (it's just pass/fail) I will be gaining so much.