Holding my breath

Ok so its Sunday night and everything seems to be going ok!

Xavier has been in bed for 3 1/2 hours and we haven't heard from him, could things be better??

He has been fantastic over the last 2 days. Not sure why, but I don't care as long as he is back to his happy self. My money is on the a/b's, and the fact that he isn' t on them anymore. I googled 'cefaclor' which is the a/b that he has been on for the last 2 weeks, and yes it is a rare side effect but it does cause joint pain. It all kinda makes sense now; why he was so distressed when I tried to lay him across me to feed (must have hurt), why he would collapse to the floor crying when he was crawling and why he was constantly hitting and rubbing his head. It all makes sense He hasn't done any of that over the last 2 days, he has been so happy and content. He is even feeding!!! My supply didn't even drop off too bad, but I am offering him extra feeds to try to bring to up again.

He is still on the medication for the giardia, but I still doubt he had it (but not enough to stop the medication!!)

So I should find out the results from his blood tests tomorrow, I am sure that now they will come back all clear!!!

I am so, so, so happy that my precious little boy is on the mend. This last week has been one of the toughest I have had with the 2 kids, it was so heartbreaking knowing that something was wrong but now knowing what. I am so glad that I kept pushing and persisting. I hate to think that he could of been on the horrible stuff for any longer than he needed to be.

Tomorrow I am going to devote to my gorgeous little man. Grace has got a make up day for school so its just Xav & I. We have some shopping to do then we might curl up together for a luxurious nap.

Clickety-click, 66

My very clever and talented husband had a major achievement yesterday!

He shot 66 at the Grand Golf Club and is now the proud owner of the course record. Well he has the ameteur course record, Stuart Appleby has the professional record of 65! Par for the course is 72, so that is a magnificant 6 under! He had a bogey free round, a score card full of pars, birdies and even an eagle.

The previous course record of 68 (which was also Duane's) has been there for a few years and Duane had been wanting to beat it for ages.

He was so happy and excited, even more so that it was in the 1st round of the club championship. This brilliant round puts him in the lead at the moment, leading by 6 shots.

Not bad for a guy that only plays golf once a week now! He has so much natural talent for golf. He says that he is playing better now than he ever has. Duane did try to get onto the Japanese tour and although he made it through the first 2 rounds, he unfortunately missed out on the 3rd. I'm not sure how he would have coped anyway, he didn't really have the drive or passion for it. I mean he has the passion, just not in a competitive & selfish way. Also we missed each other terribly when he was travelling all the time & he really missed being at home.

I just keep telling him to wait for the 'seniors tour', by then we'll be free to travel the world together!

He can't wait to get the kids into golf. It's such a great sport and they will have the most patient and talented teacher!!

Poking & prodding the baby!

~~Xavier after having blood take....his poor little arm!~~

My poor little boy had his blood taken today. He was a very brave boy though and dealt with it so well.

The nurses were all trying to get out of doing it, nobody wanted to "hurt" my baby boy. The lady that did end up doing it was so relieved that he was ok and not in too much pain. Before she started she said that I didn't have to stay if I didn't want to as it can be quite traumatic to watch. There was no way I was leaving my baby in there alone, imagine how frightened he would have been without his Mummy and being jabbed. So I held him down as I whispered in his ear and kissed his little face.

He cried and sobbed as she took the blood (all 2 viles of it), but once it was over he was fine. He even had a few smiles. So after he had his little bandage put on we headed over to visit the pead.

The pead that we are seeing is Dr Price. He seems nice enough, very thorough and was friendly with Xavier. I told him about everything that has been happening, then he gave him a check over. He checked his ears, throat, tummy and penis. He mentioned that he may have kidney trouble or urinary tract troubles becuase of his partial cicumcision. Apparently an anomoly on the outside of the body can actually mean somethings is wrong inside, so he has asked me to get a wee sample to check.

Xavier's ears seemed fine today, but they have probably cleared up from the A/b's. The Dr has told me to stop giving him the A/b's though as they are probably causing him pain as it is one of the side effects. He has given me a script for another type to use if his ears get infected again. I also have a referral for Xavier to get a ear examination to see if he has any inner ear blockages that are causing him grief. The earliest I could get in for this is the 22nds April, unless a cancellation comes up.

After the Dr had gone over everything he asked me whether there had been any gastro in the family. He said that Xavier may be experiencing stomach pains and that it was can be dangerous in babies. He then mentioned having to keep an eye out for Giardia, so I told him about Duane having it when I was pregnant. His head spun around and he said "this changes everything" I told him that Duane was treated, but he said that we all should have been done. Apparently it can remain dormant in your body and then reinfect those in very close contact. He has put Xavier on medication to treat the Giardia without even having a definate dignosis. He said that it is vital that it is treated, even if it is only a small chance that he has it. I feel a litte uncomfortable about giving Xavier medication for something that is not confirmed but both the Dr and pharmacist have reassurred me that it is ok. The Dr has also said that if Xavier improves dramatically over the weekend to also treat Grace. So I guess we will see how that goes.

One a good note, Xavier has fed ok today. He fed at 6am, 3pm and then at 5.30pm & he was ok with it. I am so glad that he is feeding again. It would have broken my heart not to be feeding him, especially when he is sick. I love giving him "mummy's milk" & all the good antibodies that come with it. Its my own special little medicine.

So now we just wait for the blood results. I am actually dreading it. I have only ever told Duane & Mum this, but I have always thought that something is wrong with Xavier. I'm not sure what, it's just a feeling that I have had for the last few months. I dont' want to give the thoughts too much energy so I push them away, and then this all comes up. I hope that it is just my over active mind and not my intuition.

Still not good

Well Xavier is not getting much better.

After not feeding at all on Tuesday I was hoping that he would make up for it in the night. He woke up at 9.30pm and couldn't be settled. He was just hysterical and getting so hot. I tried to feed him but he kept pushing me away and getting so distressed. He slept in with us, but spent most of the night writhing around in pain. I finally got him to feed at 1.30am, I virtually had to force him on. Once he was attached though he had a decent feed. I was so glad that he did though, I was so full and uncomfortable. I tried to get him onto the other side, but he just fell asleep.

He fed again at 5am and then didn't feed again all day. It's like he is pain when I lay him down to feed. He pushes me away and gets so upset, he gets really hot and big fat tears spurt out of his gorgeous blue eyes. I get so upset watching him get so distressed, but I also don't want him to not feed. I would be so upset if he didn't feed again. I know that he is a pain in the bum sometimes to feed, but I highly doubt that he is self-weaning at this young age. I really think that he is in some type of pain, or he has been and he is associating the pain with feeding.

He was so clingy and just cried all day today and yesterday. He still seemed to be in so much pain yesterday so I called the on call Dr to come out again. He checked him over and said that his ears and throat are still red. He thinks that he might be still unwell as he is getting over the infections and also that he may be having a reactiont to the A/b's. He said that sometime the A/b's that he is on can cause joint pain, so to keep him topped up with panadol.

Last night he still wouldn't fed when he went to bed, so gave him a cup of expressed milk. He took some of it, but then started doing the same thing that he does when I feed him. He woke at about 2am again and I bought him into my bed and he fed again. He was a little better, not crying and moaning in his sleep as much.

Today he is still really upset and fed once but only when I was laying down. I thought that it might be hurting him the way that I hold him when we feed. So today I tried every other way possible. Nothing made him feed.

I took him to our regular Gp today, hoping to get a referral for the recurring ear infections. Xavier was being a little charmer, I don't think that the Dr believed everything that I was telling her. As I sat there telling her about hime being in pain and crying all the time, he sat there smiling and "making eyes" at her. But then he started to go down hill again. He was so upset and she could definately see what I was talking about. She checked him all over, but couldn't come to any reason why he was inso much pain. She thought that maybe his teeth are causing him grief but agreed with me that his behaviour seemed too extreme for that.

She has given me a referral for a pead and also to get some bloods done. I went straight to pathology to get it over and done with, only to be told that they needed 2 staff to do babies. Hmmm, 1 to hold down and 1 to stick 'em I guess. My poor little baby.

Anyway I managed to get into the Pead tomorrow at 12.30, lucky someone cancelled or it could have been a month away. Fat lot of good that would have been for now though. As much as I would pay anything for my little boy, its still an expensive little visit. $280 all up, but I do get $200 back from Medicare. I coul have gone public, but not sure how long I would have to wait though. I have also made an appt to get his blood taken at 11.20. I am so not looking forward to that, especially if he wont feed. I have always settled him after his needles with boob. He has always been great with getting needles, I hope that he is fine with giving blood.

Grace is hopefully going to be at school tomorrow. As she missed out on Tuesday I am trying to get her in for a make up day. If she can't get in I'll try to drum someone up to have her, I would prefer not to take her to the Dr's!! She has been an absolute angel through all this. We have been stuck at home all this week and she has been great. Normally she gets a little crazy and housebound, but she understands that Xavier is sick. She just wants to help me with him which is so sweet. I do let her hold his arms down when I am putting his ear drops in, it's so hard to do alone!! I hope that doesn't come back to bite me on the bum!!

Actually something funny. Grace must have overheard me talking about Xavier 'cutting" teeth. So the other day she was playing with her kiddy scissors and I heard her say, "Gracie will cut Xaviers teeth" Oh dear......looks like its back to full supervision with the scissors!

~~Grace being busted painting everything BUT the paper~~

What a shocker!

We have had a shocker of a day!

Xavier wasn't too bad last night, only woke once for a booby feed. I thought it would be more considering his ear infection.

I was looking forward to having a realxing day at home, just me and Xavier. Well that didn't happen, Grace woke with the snottiest, yukkiest nose I have ever seen. It was just like 2 plugs of silicone shoved up her nose. As much as I would have loved to send her, I did the good parent thing and kept her at home. She had a little runny nose in the morning, but was fine from about 10am onwards....dammit! Should have packed her off then......if I could have peeled Xavier from my chest to at least have a shower!!

Xavier was a mess ALL DAY. He spent most of the day crying and moaning whilst grabbing his ears. He just wanted his Mummy to cuddle him all day, and he just cried if I put him down. He slept on me on and off all day, just having little 40 minute catnaps. I enjoyed the cuddles, but it makes it hard to get things done for Grace.

Xavier came into my bed at about 5am and had a feed. It's now 8.30pm and he hasn't fed again. Everytime that I have tried to feed him he has bitten me. Not just a little gummy bite either....the boy has 6 visible teeth, with others on the way. He bit down so hard the first time I screamed, I wasn't expecting it. Scared the crap out of all of us; Grace, Xavier and me. I expressed a dismal amount, 50ml. I haven't expressed since Grace was 6 weeks old, I just don't like it. However it was urgent today, I kept thinking that the dreaded mastitis was coming. There was a lump in my right boob and I was going hot and cold. Not sure if I was fighting of mastitis or just a cold.

Grace thought it was hilarious though! She kept wanting to drink the expressed milk, I had to hide it from her! If I was any better at it I would express some for her, but it took my very full boobs 20mins to get 25 ml each time I expressed. I concentrated so hard, but I couldn't get a let down.

Xavier was still having wet nappies so I doubt that he is dehydrated. He was guzzling the water, but a bit of his solids. I hope that the A/b's kick in soon and my little boy likes his boobies again. I am kinda hoping that he wakes tonight and spends the night with me. I'll open the "booby buffett" and he can help himself all night!!

**I forgot to mention Xaviers other misfortune today. Not sure how he did it but he somehow face planted on the carpet. He was screaming and I picked him up and there was blood everywhere, mixed in with his snotty nose too of course! I think that he had cut his lip. Maybe his little mouth is sore and that's why he doesn't want to feed?

Sunday night ritual

Ok so the last 4 Sunday nights have gone like this:

• During the day Xavier starts getting a runny nose which gets worse about 4pm
• He starts getting irritable, extremely tired and pulling at his ears
• I put him to bed early, he goes easily
• After about an hour he wakes and will not settle
• We then spend the next 6 hours trying to settle an upset bub who will not lay down to sleep
• Xavier sleeps with us and has booby all night as that is the only way he will go to sleep
• We go to the Dr first thing Monday morning and Xavier has an ear infection
• YES THIS HAS HAPPENED EVERY SUNDAY NIGHT

It seems my little boy has a case of Sunday-itis and saves all his sickness up for that night!

Last night was one of the worst yet though. He was getting fevers even on panadol and was constantly hot and sweaty. He spent the first part of the night asleep on my chest, but if I moved at all he woke up and cryed hysterically. Made it a bit hard for me to eat dinner & go to the toilet. I tried putting him back into his bed, but everytime he layed down he woke straight up. I eventually got him to sleep on the couch and then took him to our bed when I went. I can't remember how many times I fed him overnight, but everytime he squawked he got boobed. It was the only way to get him back to sleep again.

As it's Easter Monday there is only 1 Dr working at our normal sugery. I called to make an appt, but it would have meant up to 2 1/2 hours waiting in the surgery. No thanks...bad enough dealing with my sick little cherub at home let alone in a sickly surgery!! So I called the house- call Dr's and they were happy to come out. I was told someone would be there within the next 2 hours, But I had no sooner jumped in the shower and the Dr turned up. How good was that, it took less than 1/2 hour!

I explained to the Dr about the other ear infections. He checked Xavier over and yep....ANOTHER BLOODY EAR INFECTION!!!

We have been so careful since the first one, trying not to get any water in or near his ears. We've even had to miss out on our family spa, which we have every second night. Duane had ear troubles when he was younger and had to have grommetts, so I can only assume that poor Xavier has picked this up from "The Penney" side. Thats were all my kids get their faulty bits from. Hahaha

Anyway the Dr gave us a new script for A/b's & ear dops. He has also suggested that we go back to our Dr and get a referral to a Ear, Nose & Throat specialist to find out why he is getting them all the time.

I am really glad we have found out about the on call Dr's though. What a great service and its bulk billed to Medicare!

I should get back to cuddling my sick little baby. When he is sick, he just wants his Mummy. he's such a Mummy's boy......or is it just the boobies he wants???

Easter 2008

We have had a lovely Easter.

I was very excited this year because I got to do an Easter Egg hunt for Grace. Mum used to do them for us every year, I even remember doing one at 18!!

I clearly remember the last one she did for me. I had just met Duane. I had gone with Daniel to Stuart Mattheson's house, I think that Daniel was trying to set Duane & I up. There were a few other people there, and we all just sat around chatting and enjoying some drinks. Slowly people started leaving and it ended up with just Duane and I laughing and making polite conversation. Duane served up so many cups of tea, that I actually thought it a little strange. That certainly wasn't my drink of choice, and he was serving the tea with dinky little saucers. Who does that??? Especially at 19!!

So we sat there drinking copious cups of tea & getting to know each other. The sun started coming up....we had been chatting all night and it was now morning, Easter Sunday. I said goodbye and drove home. As I was driving up my driveway, mum was hiding the Easter Eggs for the hunt. Although I probably groaned at Mum for doing it, I still loved doing the hunt that she always put so much effort into.

This was the last one for me, as in the October Duane & I made the big move from Tassie to Queensland. Its a tradition though that I want to share with my children.

Anyway back to the now.

So after an early morning wake-up, Daddy and the kids hung out in our room whilst Mummy went and checked the Easter Bunny had remembered us.

After the all clear, we took Grace into her room to find the first of her treasure. She had made an Easter basket at school the week before so I had set that up on her bookcase with the first egg (well yogurt covered fruit wrapped up in foil) & clue for the next one.

It took a few clues before she started to really get into it and eagerly ran to the next hiding place. Easter bunny was very creative and had printed out the clues on Easter paper. We spent the next hour or so finding eggs in all sorts of places. In the mail box,

the TV,

toys,

and lots of other places.

At the end of the hunt, Grace sat down and gobbled up the treats. She was very generous and offered some to Mummy & Daddy.

I made blueberry pancakes and we all had a lazy, long breakfast. After heaving our full belly's from the table we went to the hospital to visit Grandma. Grace proudly gave her an Easter Bonnet that she had made and also a sugar free chocolate bunny, can't imagine how yummy that would have been !!! Grandma gave the kids a yogurt bunny each. Grace was familiar with the egg thing by now and immediately opened hers and gobbled it down. I did my bit and assisted Xavier's with his, well I ate it and then fed him! That counts right?

The kids were well behaved at the hospital, Grace belted out a few of her favourite songs. The old bitties all smiled and encouraged her, but I am sure they were glad to see us leave!

After we all had a snooze, we headed over to The Ryans for a BBQ lunch. It was a lovely relaxing afternoon. Emily kept Grace amused, which is always a bonus. Grace loves following her around and copying everything that she does. Emily has a electric ride on scooter that she rides around the house. Grace was sitting on it and playing with the key hole when she must have turned it on. She went flying back into the couch, the look on her face was priceless, she was not expecting it to move. Xavier was doing well until later on in the afternoon he started getting a runny nose and really upset. Well it turned out that he had another ear infection.