WW week 18

I DID IT!!!!!!

I only scraped it in, but good enough to finally get to my goal weight of 66kgs! I weighed in at 65.9, so only 100 grams off, but I did have 100 grams of sunglasses on my head too!!

So, now I'm at goal weight the next challenge is to maintain it for the next 6weeks and into the future. I'm upping my points, then depending on my weight over the next 6 weeks, the points will be re-adgusted.

I'm excited and proud of myself, but not as happy as I thought I would be. I just feel a bit of a fraud for thinking that this is it, and being ok with the weight I am now. I'm comfortable now, and know that what I am now will be fairly easy to maintain, but I can't shake the feeling that I'm still too big. I feel like I don't deserve to be at goal weight, considering that I could loose another 5 kgs or so, but just don't have the desire or motivation to do it.

I look at myself, and theres still plenty of bits to grab and prod. These are the bits I want gone, and I really need to face up to the fact they are not going just from eating properly. Diet only takes you so far, excercise will do the rest. So I really need to get serious if I want to rid my belly of the soft bread dough look.

But for now, I'm happy. I've achieved what I wanted to do, and that was to get back into a healthy bmi range - which I have.

Grace's 4th birthday celebration # 321890393

Gosh, birthday celebrations for kids can get really strung out. What with friends, family, playgroup & pre-school - that's a lot of cake and singing!

At the pre-school that Grace goes to, they do a little celebration at the end of the day for the Birthday child. Grace had hers on the Tuesday after her actual birthday, and Duane, Wendy, Xav and I all headed up about 3pm to join in the fun. I'd made little apple crumble cupcakes, which were requested by the birthday girl herself.

She had a fantastic day at school, the teachers made an extra effort in making her feel special over the day. In the morning when I dropped her off, they had been telling all the other children about the very special day they were celebrating today. Grace had asked to wear her birthday crown for the day, which was aahhed and oohhed over by the carers.

We got up there just as the kids were packing up after having a sleep. Snoozy bum Grace was still lazing about in bed, enjoying her weekly nap. She woke just as we got there, packed up and gave us all a shy little cuddle. It's so funny to see your normally out-going and talkative child so shy and subdued, I'm sure next year when she is going twice a week they will be privileged to see her non-quiet side!

The middle of the room had been set up with a circle of cloths, and around the circle were wide strips of the same cloth.

All the children were playing outside, then Miss Christine asked them all to come wash their hands and hop on a boat ready to go to Birthday Island.

The kids all were excited and knew exactly what to do, they all hurried to wash their hands and each found a spot on the outer of the circle in their pretend Boats. Each of the 4 boats had a turn singing "Row, row your boat" imagining that they were rowing to the middle of the island. At last it was Grace's boats turn, and after pretending to row the boat, all the kids with her were asked to anchor the boat and head into the circle.

Grace was up the front with Miss Christine who lit a candle on top of one of the cupcakes, then all the kids sung Happy Birthday whilst my little girl sat quietly with her little brother, taking it all in.

After the candle was blown out, Grace was given a very special present that the carers had made especially for her. She unwrapped it carefully, and excitedly held it up for everyone to see - a beautiful red fleece fairy. It was supposed to go into her fairy garden, but shes decided that it can live on the Christmas tree for a while.

After the kids had eaten all the cupcakes, and then each said Happy Birthday to Grace, we headed outside for a little play.

And THAT is the end of 4th birthday celebrations for my little girl.

WW week 17

Well, after last weeks little blip, I was determined to be a perfect student and hopefully see fantastic results at the end of the week.

After going through what I ate last week, I actually think my 1.2kg (*gulp*) gain was down to a few things. The first one being that I don't think I actually ate enough and the second thing being my consistent weight gain the week before my period. Both of these things happened, so this week I was more than happy to eat every single one of my points, gladly.

Yippee - It all payed off!! I hoped on the scales, and was rewarded with a 1.5kgs lose!! So, now I am 66.2, and only 2oo pesky grams away from getting to my goal weight. I'm actually thinking I might revise it down a few kgs now, but we'll see how I feel in a few weeks. I know I need to pull my finger out and get working on some toning exercises, even thoughts of the gym having been flashing through my mind - strange.


This week, I'm going to try very,very hard to loose those last 200 grams and get myself into maintenance, no idea what that is yet though.

Happy 4th Birthday Grace

Dear Gracie,

Wow, 4 years my dear. I'm still slightly in denial that the little girl in front of me is actually my baby girl - you have grown so much.

You are my sweet little girly-girl, always taking delight in the prettier things and living by the motto that a "girl can never have too much bling" I'm not really sure where you get your fashion obsession from, but it's a beautiful trait and can either having me tearing my hair out trying to change you or laughing my head off. You have an amazing way of pulling together outfits. I look at you as you make the choices from your wardrobe, thinking to myself that will never work - but you always manage to pull it off.

You are my gentle, loving little girl, who has no problem being raucous or loud. You love the outdoors and are in your element surrounded by nature, especially pretty flowers. You have a love for nature that is showing itself more and more everyday. Apart from your current phase of ant squashing, you love all animals and have a special place in your heart for any furry friend that you meet. Your ultimate pet would be a pony, and one day I promise, I will make that dream come true.

You're my right hand girl in the kitchen, always wanting to help out. You can make your breakfast all by your self (toast or cereal) and you've even got a few meals up your sleeve for when I can't be bothered cooking. Spaghetti on toast is something that you can whip up from start to finish, and you do often. You also love nothing better than baking something yummy, then licking the beaters and bowl clean.

Although there are many fights and arguments, I know that you adore your little brother. You are the first to check if he is ok when he cries, offering a sisterly cuddle and reassuring words. He really looks up to you Grace, and he spends most of the day wanting to be like you - both good and bad. Watching the 2 of you laugh and play together is a sight that I never tire of. Watching my 2 children interact and love each other, its just magic to know that we have given you both the gift of a sibling. I love you for sharing your love with him.

Your 4 now. It's been a wonderful and sometimes challenging past year - 3 was definitely a year of testing boundaries, but apart from all the "interesting" times, it's been an absolute delight parenting you. With the testing times, also comes loads and loads of truly special moments. Your chatter, although at times makes me want to invest in gaffer tape, is hilarious. The sound of your own voice is so obviously pleasing to you, so talking just for the sake of talking, happens A LOT. The conversations that you have though are beautiful, giving us a glimpse into how you adorable mind all works. Your chatter gets quicker as the day ends, it's like you have a daily quota of words that you MUST get through.

You have matured so much over the last few months, I've really noticed a change in your attitude and how you interact with everyone. You're much more sympathetic, helpful and understanding. You're slowly realising that there is more to the world than our little realm. We love confusing you with family trees, watching your little eyes squint as you try to work out the logistics of Nanny having a baby and that baby being your Mummy. You're always asking if Mummy or Daddy did the things that you do now, when they were little.


Your happy to play with the kids, but most of the time your hanging around the adults, listening and observing and then asking a million questions about what is being said. I know that this is payback from what I used to do to my own Mum, karma and all that. The only way to pry you apart from the adult talk is to put you in charge of a baby, then you are in your element. You would dearly love a baby brother or sister to fuss over, your maternal side is such a strong part of your personality. Although I loved having you and Xav born so close together, I often wonder how much easier things would have been if he was born with you at this age, and you being such a wonderful helper.

I've taught you how to hand sew and finger knit, and we have been busy making Christmas decorations. For a girl that wouldn't sit still to do anything, you've developed so much patience with these 2 new skills. I set you up with a threaded needle and you are quite happy to sew and sew and sew. You love it even more if I sit and sew with you, it always turns unproductive though as we chat and giggle to each other.

You're most treasured things are your jewellery, your favourite clothes and your family. You absolutely adore a particular pair of jeans, that you have carefully packed away for next winter. I don't have the heart to tell you that, the way you are growing, they will be closer to shorts by the time next winter rolls around. I guess when a girl finds a perfect pair of jeans, she lives in them right?!

You love your Daddy with every ounce of yourself, you truly are a Daddies little girl. His fingers are getting constricted from being wound so tightly, but he loves every minute of it. He is the one you choose to cuddle of a night if you sneak in to our bed. I try to steal you away, but you always shimmy back to your Daddy. He is who you want when you are sick or upset, at your happiest and most content in his loving arms. He makes you feel safe and loved and its really beautiful to see the special bond you have together. You're his little girl, and I have no doubt, that however old you are, there will always be a place for you in his arms. You definitely did score in the Daddy stakes though, yours is top of the range - absolutely brilliant. I look at the relationship that the 2 of you have and I often wonder if it was the same between me and my Daddy. You are at the exact age now I was when I lost mine, and can't even bare to think about that happening to you and Xav.

You are a beautiful girl Grace, both inside and out. Of course I am completely biased, but looking at you, still takes my breath away. I am in awe that your Daddy and I could create such a stunning little girl that seems to be getting more beautiful as she gets older. You have the most gloriously soft and creamy skin, so silky and completely blemish free. Your little button nose has been with you right from the start, its the cutest little ski-jump and gives you an adorable profile.

Your face is so expressive, so much so that I'm sure you'll make a lousy poker player. Everything you feel is written all over your face. The toddler body is all gone, replaced with a long torso and shapely "go on for miles" legs. You still have the little pot belly though, a cute reminder of my little baby girl. Your hair is such a beautiful honey blonde colour, when it's wet it reaches the top of your bum. When its dry, it's curls up gorgeously, tucked behind your ears or held back with an Alice band. I love playing with your hair, trying out all sorts of hairstyles, but you only have so much patience before you demand it to be put back in a head band and left alone.

This will be our last year at home together before Prep. You will be heading off to pre-school 2 days a week starting next year, and I'll be off to uni (hopefully!) I'm sad that in your last year at home, we will be separated, however I'm vowing to make as much time for you as you need. I'm promising to make this your 4th year, the very best. We will make many beautiful memories, I want you to remember this part of your childhood as your BEST. I'm running with your vivid imagination, and this year is going to be the most magical yet, full of wonder and excitement. I promise, that although I will be busy with school I will always make time for you.

Grace, you really are my little sunshine girl. I hope that you realise how much we all love you and how much joy you have bought into our family.

You have a very special place in my heart. YOU are the one that made me a Mother, all that time ago. I barely can remember life with out you, it's like a piece of you has always been with me, waiting for the right time to join us. I knew deep in myself that one day I would be blessed with a daughter and you are everything and more that I could ever want.

Every night, as I am heading to bed, I go to check on you. Asleep, your face is an exact image of yourself as a baby - a reminder to me that you were once my dependant newborn.

Happy 4th Birthday to my very special first born. I love you as much as you could possibly imagine, and more.

Love Mummy xx

Grace's Birthday

I tucked my little girl in bed, for the very last time as a 3 year old. We talked about the last 3 years, and how tomorrow she would be 4. The birthday fairies were going to come and spread her with magical fairy dust, then tomorrow she would wake up older.

I read her a beautiful birthday story, then kissed her goodnight and we cuddled until she was asleep. I love the drowsy time as my children slip off to sleep, its one of my favourite times with the children. Watching eyes get heavy and speech become slower, then slowly there little bodies relax as they drift off to dreamland.

This morning she woke, excited about it being her very special day. I gave her her birthday crown to wear, which she did for the morning. We had some cuddle and reminiscing time on our bed, along with an unsuccessful family photo shoot.


Nanny had sent up a special birthday present a few days earlier, so it was taken down from the hiding place and handed over to the birthday girl. The very lucky girl was given a lovely wooden flower press, complete with pre-pressed flowers from Nannies garden. She wasn't too sure what it was, but after some showing and explaining, she understood and was very excited about pressing her very own flowers from the garden. She also was given a beautiful craft book, full of wonderful ideas for us to do together. There was also a smacker lip gloss, which she has had permanently attached to her hip since, so I guess that was a hit!

Grandma and Poppy came up about 7am, then we headed outside for the big present unveiling. It was our old sink that my Fil had built into a bench. It's set up so the hose connects straight to the bottom and the kids can use the top like a normal tap. She was thrilled with the surprise, her and Xav both wanted to play with it straight away.

She then was given a present from the grandparents, a dish drainer and dishes to go on the side of the sink.

It was only a quick play with the new sink, as we had planned to head down to Paradise Point for a big beach breakfast.

The kids ran amok on the playground, chasing Poppy and Daddy around, whilst Wendy and I cooked the big feast. There was bacon, eggs, toast and crumpets. All washed down with a special treat of Grace's favourite apple juice. I was stoked as there was a power point, which meant I could take the jug and have endless cups of tea.

After a delicious breakfast, the kids headed out on to the jetty to give their new kites a fly. Xav got bored quickly, and Grace wasn't too far behind - however Duane and Trevor were having a blast.


After cleaning up, Wendy and I perched in our fold-up chairs, right beside the beach to catch the breeze. We watched as the kids splashed and frolicked in the shallow waters.

Duane dropped Grace & I off at Nicole's house, and he headed how with Xav for a siesta. Poor Duane has come down again with giardia, he had it about 2 years ago, whilst I was pregnant with Xav. Apparently it's something that can flare up again, and seems it has in him. He's on a strong a/b now, so hopefully it gets the rotten parasite out of his system.

We hung out at the Truets for the afternoon, just lazing around and chatting. Duane turned up at about 3pm to pick us up, which is when he gave me the wonderful news that we were now $4700 richer. Yippee!!

We headed up to the Silkwood school for the markets and Christmas carols. I had big plans of preparing a picnic dinner, but forgot, so was hoping that food would be available. We weren't disappointed. Firstly we all enjoyed some chop suey and rice, then the kids moved onto gelati for dessert. Duane reminisced over his Japanese food days, and had some takoyaki balls.

I managed to snare a few bargains from the stalls. A wooden clock for the basement price of $1 and a cute little holly hobby nappy cover, which is going to look devine on a certain little 6 month girl that I know.

The kids, of course, were immediately drawn to the face painting. Both gave their stock standard request - Xav wanting a scary spider and Grace a beautiful butterfly.

Duane & I got to relax on a picnic rug chatting to some friends, whilst the kids played chasey on the oval. Once the carols started though, they came back over to listen. Xav was a crack-up, somehow his funky dancing skills don't really suit Christmas carols - but he boogied the night away, loving the attention that he was collecting from his random fans. He does this crazy little leg flick and hand jiggle dance, and when I asked him what he was doing he answered "My drum dance". It did look a lot like a rock drummer on speed, now that he mentioned it.

The kids after a while, plucked up the courage, and shimmied there way to right up the front - where they sat diligently for the rest of the concert.

We headed home at about 8pm, got the kids in their pj's and tucked into bed.

I layed with Grace and we looked over her birth photos, she then asked me to tell her again the story of when she was born.

I love telling her this story, it's still so deeply etched into my memories and without doubt, one of my most wonderful moments. Grace knows the story so well, and sometimes tells me her side of what happened. She says that she was inside my tummy and was pushing me with her arms and legs, trying to get out and be born. I really wish that I had her birth videoed, so she could see how magical that time was for all of us. But I don't, so I'll just have to keep reminding her.

Of course, I had to take my photo from the time of birth. So this is my beautiful Grace at 10.08pm on the 27th November 2009:

I just can't believe that it has been 4 years since I was flung into this sometimes chaotic but always amazing world of parenthood.

~~Happy Birthday my beautiful Daughter~~

Almost a millionaire

I was almost a millionaire.

Almost had to spend days searching for my dream house & furnishing it perfectly - complete with humungous vegie patch, horse and an orchard.

I nearly got to go to several banks and pay off the mortgage of all my closest friends and family, then present them with their deeds in a frame.

Hubby nearly got to call work and give his notice, then spend his days being a stay-at-home dad who volunteered and spent lazy days on the golf course.

I was > - < close to being able to travel the world as I pleased, taking the kids to winter in Canada, safari in South Africa and any where else that took my fancy.

BUT it all came down to 1 measly number. 1 number stopped all of those ^^^^ dreams.

My husband told me today that he always buys a powerball ticket when he goes on holidays, in the hope that he wins enough money and doesn't have to go back to work. He could just extend the holiday indefinitely. It's not like he doesn't enjoy his job, but it's physically tough and hey, who wouldn't want the option to not have to go to work.

Anyway, today he fronted up to the newsagent and presented his ticket. "Can you check my loosing ticket" He asked. "Sure, but I hope it's a winner for you" answered the friendly shop assistant. She scanned it then looked over at his and smiled "Well, I can't give you that much, you'll have to wait for the cheque", she then said very excitedly. "You've won about $4700, but the bad news is you were 1 number off winning about 8 million dollars" Doh!

I'm stoked about winning nearly 5 grand. Within 5 minutes of Duane telling me the good news, I had mentally done up a wish list, and there wasn't much change.

First thing on the agenda is a service and air-con for the car. Next is the study cupboards done exactly how I want, and also a new solar hot water service. Duane's asked for $500 play money, not sure what he wants it for, but he never spends money so I couldn't really say no hey! The rest (if there is any!!) will go in the kids school account. It's already looking healthy, but considering schooling is going to be a large on-going cost, it needs to be supersized.

Oh, and the number that he missed out. 35. It's his age.

WW week 16

Ok, what have I learnt this week?

That you can't snack all day when you are camping.
That the odd lick, taste or bite when you are baking is not your friend.
That not going for walks or exercising can prohibit weight loss.
That tracking in your head is not very accurate.

I've learnt this and put on 1.2kgs - wow, I am so lucky.

I expected it, so wasn't too surprised. I found it slightly amusing, and hope that I can get rid of the "fresh fat" that I acquired, plus extra, next week.